Nightmare on Lakeview Drive

There are moments in your life that show you what you are made of.  Evidently I am made of jello.  I am a big bowl of wobbly green jello. I used to think I was pretty brave and well, maybe I still am...I just don't know.

The best place to start a story is at the beginning...so here goes.

I am sick. I have a massive sinus infection. So about 11pm last night I took a benedryl, which for me is heavily medicated. I normally don't take anything like that if I am home alone with the kids. You just never know what might happen. (Insert ominous foreshadowing music here) I did not listen to my inner voice, however, and I took the pill.

Somewhere between 12:30am and 1am a noise woke me from a deep sleep. I got up, walked around a little bit, everything seemed to be fine. The only thing that was wrong was that one of my dogs had peed on the floor outside my bedroom. Since I was in my drug induced stupor I decided to deal with it in the morning and just go back to sleep.

Deep sleep again...dreaming pleasantly...loud noise followed by loud crash. Then Joel's voice yelling "MOM!! MOM!!!" from the end of my bed. I am on auto pilot...Joel wakes up so much at night that I can deal with him easily without being fully awake. I look at the clock and see it's 1:15, get up and follow Joel towards the living room. As we are walking I am turning on lights and I see what the loud crash was. It was the baby gate keeping the dogs in the back of the house away from the chicks. I start to get onto Joel for opening the gate, the dogs could have hurt the chickens, blah, blah, blah...

My only thought was to get the dogs and Joel rounded back up and into bed. I see Kevin sitting in the doorway to the living room (On point and staring at the door, but I am a typical horror movie heroine and don't notice the warning signs), so I start yelling for Eli. I can't find him but decide to get the gate back up and Kevin and Joel stowed away (I find Eli later in my room sound asleep in his bed on the floor). Before leaving that part of the house I check on the chickens.  They are a little keyed up but otherwise fine. As we are leaving, Joel points to the front door and starts to growl. That's strange I think and keep moving.

I put Joel back in his bed and notice the security light is on. I take a peek outside to see if David is home early, don't see him...must be the cat, then tell Joel goodnight. Joel won't stay in his bed so I tell him to just go get in my bed. He does and I decide to go to the bathroom. That light was still on so I decide to turn it off...after all the window is open.  (This is the part of the movie where the music is starting to get a little higher and faster, but our heroine is still in her own little world.)

I am sitting there doing my thing when I hear the wind chimes on the front door clang. You see, I have wind chimes on all of my doors because I live in a house where the preschool crowd has always loved to escape. Anyway, chimes are a chiming.  Maybe David is home...but he can't be I just looked outside and didn't see his scooter. This is that moment when all of the pieces started to fall into place.Noise earlier, loud noise just now, Joel yelling for me, Kevin on guard, chickens keyed up, Joel pointing at door and growling. OH! F&%K!!! Someone is trying to get into my house!!! My brain starts hyperventilating but I am not breathing.

I dare to take a peek out the window...remember I am still in the bathroom...trying to keep as still as possible.  There is no knock on the door but I definitely hear someone on the front porch. I hear some shuffling and then all of the sudden a man comes into my view. He is right in front of the window I am standing by! He hasn't noticed me yet. He is walking slow enough that I get a good look at him. White male, mid 50s, wearing only dark blue or grey sweat pants, bald head, bandaged left forearm. Then, when he is directly in front of me he turns his head suddenly and is staring at me. Just his head, like something out of a real deal horror movie. Our eyes are locked. He saw absolute fear in mine...I saw blankness in his. Sometimes that is scarier than seeing rage. Ok...now I am breathing, hard. I have my hand over my mouth trying not to scream, I've stumbled back a few steps. The whole time he is staring blankly at me. I yell at him "You need to leave! You have to go home now!". By yell I mean a squeaky, shaky voice barely above a whisper. I slam the window shut and run for my phone. To call the police? No...didn't cross my mind. I called David.

It is a miracle that he actually picked up, and on the second ring no less. I somehow convey to him what is going on and he wants me to find out if the guy is still in front of our house. I gather my 20 seconds of insane courage and look out Joel window. He is still out there, but now he is trying to break into my car! My bug!!! Oh, heck, no! I bang on the window to no avail. That's when I realize he is trying to open my car door with imaginary keys. So I hang up with David and run back to the bathroom window.  I open it up, all of the sudden feeling much braver, but still wobbly. I yell at him to leave my car alone and that I am calling the police. Within seconds he is there again, in my face. We are inches apart, separated only by a screen.  I again tell him to go home and that I am calling 911. He tells me "But my mom told me the address was 776." This is when it clicks that something is very wrong with this man. Mentally ill, perhaps, or maybe just messed up on drugs. I tell him once more to go home, he has the wrong address. He says "OK...I'll just get in my car" and points to my bug. I tell him again that it is my car and I start to dial 911. He takes off at that. Here's the really freaky part...He looks like he is walking slow, but he was going really fast. It looked supernatural.

Joel and I station ourselves in the bathroom window making sure he doesn't come back or bother our next door neighbor...she's a single mom with three little ones. I was very worried about her. (Insert more foreshadowing music here). The police come a whopping 20 minutes later and of course don't find him. David gets home shortly after that. Alls well that ends well right?

This afternoon, the next door neighbor comes over to tell me about her strange night. About 11:45 her smoke alarm goes off, freaking her out quite a bit.There's nothing worse than something loud waking you up in the middle of the night. She calls her parents and asks them to come down and stay with her. They agree to and will be on their way shortly. She unlocks her side door for them and goes back to bed. We live in a neighborhood where that is (was) possible. About 12:30 something wakes her up. It sounds like someone in her kitchen. She hears foot steps and banging around. She calls out to her dad...no answer. She gives him a call on the phone asking if he was in her house and he tells her no, they haven't left their house yet. She is so freaked out that she can't move. Finally the sounds stop and she gets up her 20 seconds of insane courage and goes to investigate. Nothing.

This morning they found broken glass (from a drinking glass) on her front sidewalk and blood everywhere. All over her sidewalk, all over her front window, and on the handle of her side door. I told her to call the police and she did. They came out and took samples and left.

We can speculate about what happened but we will never know. All we do know is that some crazy person was between her house and mine for 45 minutes doing God knows what. I also know that I won't go to sleep until David gets home, which isn't for a couple more hours. And I also know that my poor little sweet son is terrified that the "Man with the bandage on his arm" is coming back. He keeps looking out the windows and crying if the dogs make the smallest noise.

Let's hope tonight is calm.



Sweet Dreams



Food Revolution Day

I am passionate about food...real food that is. I love eating fresh locally grown fruits and veggies! I was always the kid who ate all her vegetables without being asked (except celery...I just cannot eat it without gaging!). I also indulged in raw milk (which is illegal to buy) and fresh eggs. I am fully aware of the fact that all of this has made me a food snob. While I eat a lot of different foods, I am also very picky! Words like deep fried, batter dipped, processed, and filler make me want to run very fast in the opposite direction.

My children's enthusiasm for whole food is varied.  My eldest is a vegetarian, something I turned her onto. If left to her own devices she would be content to eat cheese, pasta (with no sauce..unless it's cheese), cucumbers,faux buffalo wings, and faux bacon. In the past year, however, she has really opened up to new foods. She actually ate a salad last night that wasn't iceberg lettuce drowned in ranch!!

My middle child is a very good eater. She'll eat all the veggies and fruit you give her, but she also likes fried things like fish sticks and nuggets. I've been tempted to show her a video on how these things are made, but she's still young and I don't want to scar her. My youngest child and only son will eat everything you put in front of him, except corn. He's also not allowed to have any processed sugar. He knows this and doesn't fight me when I tell him no to a soda, chocolate milk, or juice. Knowing that my kids will eat what I give them scares me a little, that's a lot of power. As Peter Parker's uncle Ben said, "With great power comes great responsibility".  That's scary!! It means that I get to choose if they eat fried and processed foods, candy, and chips or salads, apples, and broccoli.  For 16 years it has been up to me what goes in those little mouths and I haven't always made good choices.  This past Saturday we went to eat with our church's confirmation class, and I had a coke. I am still feeling guilty about that! But, man, every sip tasted so good.

My husband has not been much help...until recently that is. At the beginning of the year I waged war on everything unhealty in our lives. David, being the supportive husband that he is, jumped on board. After 20+ years he quit smoking!! The downside is that he is gaining weight. For the first time in his life he has to watch what he eats. Before, if I didn't buy junk food, he never complained, but if I did, he was so happy. Now he is actually encourging me to not buy crap and is finally backing me up when I tell the children "no".

For years I have been a huge Jamie Oliver fan. He's always been about healthy eating without having to have a bunch of crazy ingredients. When he started his show "Food Revolution", I was so excited. If you've never seen it you should check it out. You can see both seasons at http://www.hulu.com/. The show really sheds light on what we are feeding our kids at school. He also talks about how bad we are eating as a nation. He did the show in England with huge success, but he is having a harder time here in the states.

This year, for the first time, we are celebrating "Food Revolution Day" on May 19th.  This Saturday!! It's not just in America, but all over the world. You can see what all is going on here: http://www.jamieoliver.com/us/foundation/jamies-food-revolution/home

So in honor of Food Revolution Day I am sharing one of my favorite recipes with you.  Not only is it easy to make, but cheap! It's also rich in all kinds of vitamens and protein. Anyone who tells you you can't get the protein you need from a plant based diet doen't know what they are talking about!


Brazilian Black Bean Stew

6 servings

30 minutes or fewer

Here's a quick vegetarian version of the Brazilian national dish known as feijoada. This stew entices the eye with the colorful contrast of black beans and sweet potatoes and pleases the palate with nourishing ingredients.

• 1 Tbs. vegetable oil
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 2 medium cloves garlic, minced
• 2 medium sweet potatoes (1 to 1 ¼ lbs.), peeled and diced
• 1 large red bell pepper, diced
• 14.5-oz. can diced tomatoes
• 1 small hot green chili pepper, or more to taste, minced
• 2 16-oz. cans black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 ripe mango, pitted, peeled and diced
• ¼ cup chopped fresh cilantro
• ¼ tsp. salt

Meal plan:

1. Steam some Swiss chard while the stew is simmering and serve with warmed flour tortillas.
   In large pot, heat oil over medium heat. Add onion and cook, stirring often, until softened, about 5 minutes. Stir in garlic and cook, stirring, until onion is golden, about 3 minutes.
2. Stir in sweet potatoes, bell pepper, tomatoes (with liquid), chili and 1 1/2 cups water. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer until potatoes are tender but still firm, 10 to 15 minutes.
3. Stir in beans and simmer gently, uncovered, until heated through, about 5 minutes. Stir in mango and cook until heated through, about 1 minute. Stir in cilantro and salt. Serve hot.

Per Serving:

• Calories: 326
• Protein: 16
• Total Fat: 4
• Saturated Fat:
• Carbohydrates: 61
• Cholesterol:
• Sodium: 211
• Fiber: 17

Enjoy!! And Happy Food Revolution Day!!!

Stop to Smell the Honeysuckle

My favorite part of the day has always been right after sunset. A time of day I used to call twilight, but unfortunately I can no longer call it that without thinking of teenage vampires. Regardless, I still love that time of day. I also really love that time in the morning right before the sun peeks up from behind the trees. I guess I love these times because of the magical feel in the air. The lighting is so soft, and I just get this excited feeling like something wonderful is about to happen.

I was blessed to be outside today at both of these times. A rare treat indeed!  This morning I was out getting the chickens water (and then chasing my silly little white dog). This evening I was planting in the big garden. Both times I felt this calm come over me. It was almost as if a voice said "Stop everything you are doing and look around! Look at all the blessings God has bestowed upon you!". 

I haven't written in a while. It's not that I haven't had good ideas. I've had several. It's just that I've been in a little bit of a funk. Funk may not be the right word. Soul searching may be better. I don't know. I've just been thinking deep thoughts.  About six weeks ago one of my daughter's best friends killed herself. A beautiful girl named Ashley. She had just turned 15...a day her parent's did not celebrate...one they never had. She was well loved by many, was not bullied, she loved tattoos, David Bowie, anything French, and she always had a good story to tell.

Not even a month later, a good friend of my niece's committed suicide. He was 16. Same story...well liked, not bullied. I've been thinking a lot about these kids, and others like them who are so desperate to end their pain that they choose a permanent solution to a temporary problem. While I have been terribly sad by all of this, it's really made me cling to life so much more, almost as a tribute to them. In the past couple of weeks I've really made a conscience effort to put myself (my soul that is) first. Sounds pretty selfish, doesn't it? Let me explain my thinking...

There is this story I heard once. On Oprah, I think. It goes like this... When you board an airplane, they tell you all of the safety stuff you need to know. One of the things they tell you is "If the oxygen masks come out, put yours on first. THEN help your child and those around you." At first you think "Help myself before my kids!! Those idiots!!!" But the reason they tell you this is because if you fail to put on your mask you may pass out before you can help anyone. Then where will you be? What will happen to your kids? Apply this metaphor to your life. We are so busy with everything that we forget to stop and take in all that is good.

I don't really know where I am going with all of this, but I do know that God gave me a dose of oxygen this morning and tonight. I feel so blessed that I was able to recognize it for what it was. I had Emma run in and get my camera so I could explore all the blessings my little "farm" has to offer. Hope you enjoy them!!!



Kevin...the Miracle Puppy





Honeysuckle has taken over the far corner of the property
It smelled soooooooo good!





Thrasher




Two of my favorite blessings!! If you are having trouble with faith let me
 tell you about how these little monsters came into the family.
God is good!



Elinor's first trip to the garden!! She was very alert and curious.



Ellie again...I know a mother shouldn't pick favorites, but I can't help it with her!



The Real Reason

My sister found out my secret and sent me this pic.  I'm not  raising my own food in an effort to improve my health and that of my family, I actually know a secret.  ZOMBIES ARE COMING!!!!

In our house we have a plan for fires, tornados, earthquakes, AND Zombie apocalypse. No joke. You can ask me about it anytime. 

The Proof is in the Pudding

Well...the proof is in the yolk actually.  In case you are still confused about why you should eat local, fresh, and organic, I snapped a pic last week that I wanted to share with you. 

First a little back story.  Did you know that a well cared for hen can live as long, if not longer, than the family dog or cat? True, but they only lay for about 3 or 4 years, and you usually won't get a whole lot of eggs in the colder months. I have been getting farm fresh eggs from my parents for years, but well, their gals are getting a little on the old side. A couple of months ago they just stopped laying! Much to my dismay, I actually broke down and bought eggs at the store.  Something I hadn't done in a very long time. So I really studied those eggs at Walmart, trying to make the best choice for my family. I finally chose organic, free-range eggs for almost $4 a dozen. 

I should have know something was amiss when I opened the carton and all the eggs were the exact same shade of brown (can we say "spray paint!"). I guess you could say I was turning a blind eye. About 3/4 of the way through my last dozen store bought eggs I get the call I have been waiting for all winter..."The girls are laying again!" YAY!!!  I was so excited when my mom brought me my fresh eggs, but I wanted to make sure the others didn't go to waste. So as we were making dinner (I can't remember what...fried rice maybe?) I cracked open the last old egg and needed one more. So into the bowl went a fresh, local, truly organic egg.

I knew there was a difference, but until I saw them side by side I didn't know how big that difference was.  Keep in mind that on the outside these two eggs were the same size.

The one on the top is the one from my parent's chickens.  After I saw this, I actually said, "Holy S#*t! I have got to take a pic of this! No one will believe me!" My husband was even impressed...not easily done.

Another fun fact...you can actually tell what a hen has been fed by the color of the yolk. A hen that has been fed yellow corn and has been allowed to really and truly roam and forage will have a nice, large orange yolked egg.  Chickens LOVE to eat bugs and grass and anything else they can find hidden in the shallow earth. Some sources even say that these eggs contain more nutrients.  I like to think that is true.

On the other hand, hens that are kept "cooped up", not allowed to forage, and are fed a diet of wheat and a little white corn have very pale yolks.  Much smaller one too.

They say you are what you eat...so you have to decide...do you want to be weak, anemic looking, and tiny on the inside, or do you want to be strong, vibrant, and full of health? Hhmmm....seems like a no brainer to me. 



Darby O'Gill

I moved to Paducah 11years and 5 days ago. I was 9 months pregnant with a burning desire to leave Mississippi for good. I would have stopped at nothing to make sure that state was NOT on my daughter's birth certificate. I don't really remember why I hated Mississippi so much, but I did.

Knowing that time was of the essence, my sister took my then 4 year old daughter back to Nashville with her so we could unpack and get everything ready the coming baby. I still had over 2 weeks to go, but we wanted everything perfect for her arrival.

As we were unpacking the moving truck we discovered that the movers had riped my couch and broken my washing machine. So, 11 years and 1 day ago my mother dragged me all around Paducah looking for a new one. The day started off good, Hannah was coming back today and I was excited for her to see her new home. I know she was excited as well. She wasn't used to spending much time away from David and I. Around lunch time I started feeling very bad. I wasn't joking when I said my mother dragged me around town. All I wanted to do was sleep.

Hindsight is always 20/20 isn't it? Little did I know that I was one sick young woman. I just thought I was coming down with a cold or the flu or something. My reasoning was solid...I had just moved from a semi-tropical climate to place where winter is an actual season not just a word on the calendar. So all day I did a zombie walk, found my washer, then went back home to bed.

Late that night, as I was lying down, something strange started  happening. My abdomen started doing this weird little dance. It looked like the baby was doing the worm or like she was fighting to get out. Which I guess she probably was. I was amused but also worried.

11 years ago, I went to my doctor.  I was still feeling pretty bad, so David drove me. The first thing they always did was take my blood pressure, today was no exception. Now, there are some words you never want to hear when you are the doctor's office. Here is one sentence that immediately raises a red flag especially when followed by a routine procedure. It goes something like this, "Hmmm...Let me go get the doctor." The doctor came in and confirmed the nurses finding, I had developed Toxemia. They told me that my pregnancy could not continue safely.  I other words, I was about to become a mother for the second time!

They told me to get to the hospital right away and the doctor would be right behind me. So we loaded up and hit the road. At this point David decides he is hungry and insists on going to Burger King. He even asks me if I want something. I don't think I cursed at him but I know I thought about it. Upon arrival at the hospital I am whisked away to maternity and hooked up to all kinds of monitors and IVs. Fluids and anti-seizure medicine and medicine to induce labor, fetal monitors and blood pressure monitors. I was so hooked up that I wasn't allowed to leave my bed all day! Oh, those stupid monitors!!! They kept blasting their warnings all day long!

It was all worth it though. Emma Darby Ward was born at 8:33pm weighing in at 6 pounds 6 ounces and 21 1/2" long. She was and still is everything I always dreamed she would be. I thank God everyday for blessing me with her. She's not perfect. She can act a little bit like Eeyore and she could definitely be a little nicer to her brother, but I wouldn't change one thing about her.

The Birds and The Bees

David and I agreed when we started this little homesteading adventure that his focus would be food and mine would be animals. It's not that I find growing veggies and fruit boring, it's just that I feel the whole animal aspect of any farm or homestead so much more interesting.

I've always had a green thumb.  My dad told me a few years ago that when I was a child he would always have me plant the things he had bad luck with so they would do good. A fact I did not appreciate when I was small. I actually hated working in the garden when I was at home.  And I do stand in awe of the fact that this tiny seed turns into a bush full of the worlds best tasting tomatoes or the sweetest corn. I also take a large amount of pride in growing organic food that my kids will actually eat. I love knowing that I did this amazingly healthy thing for them.  However, it still doesn't hold the same fascination and enjoyment that raising animals does.

I love the daily interaction I get to have with the animals and the personality I get back from them. I adore the looks and excitement I get from them when I walk into the room.  I'm pretty sure my dogs worship me, and my parents chickens always sing my praises as I walk past. The fact that I am very generous with treats has nothing to do with it...maybe.

So last week, after much research, I finally got around to ordering my chicks. It was a hard decision! There is so much that has to be taken into consideration. How many? Color of eggs? Size of eggs? How many eggs a week? Good layers or good for meat or both? Cold hardy? Friendly? Free range or "cooped up"? You can even take a little quiz on www.mypetchicken.com to see which breed would be best for you. In fact that is what I did and came up with a short list of little ladies I'd love to have. What I ended up getting are four Barred Plymouth Rock and 3 Partridge Plymouth Rock. These gals are friendly, dependable, good layers (brown eggs), do well in winter, and can stand being cooped up, but love running around.

They are hatching out on March 26th, and I should get them a day or two after that.  I know I'm very excited but I am surprised to see how excited the kids are especially Hannah, my oldest. She is reading the same books I am and throwing out little chicken facts. She's so excited that I decided to take her to the feed store with me. Which was a funny experience. She was terrified by the coyote traps and in awe of the goat and sheep food.  It was very sweet. So now I wait. I'm not very good at waiting, but I know I still have lots to do. With the help of my father I almost have the brooder box done.

I also got some "new" bee hives this week.  My dad was a bee keeper, and it's something I've always wanted to do. A few years back my cousin, Anne, started bee keeping, but due to certain twists in her life had to give it up. She was generous enough to loan me her stuff.  Now I just need lots more knowledge and a couple of colonies! I learn best from doing, so I will be (hopefully) taking some classes in April from a local bee expert that Anne recommends. I am most nervous about this. You might get stuck with thorns from a blackberry bush, chased by an angry chicken, but bees can kill you. My dad likes to tell me tales of when he got stung. That doesn't calm the nerves though. His best advice is to just get used to the fact that I'm going to get stung. I try to tell myself that it will be no big deal...can't be worse that tattoos and piercings...right?